No Name-brand Red, Spain - 201?

I found out a few weeks ago that No Name, the poorman's best bet at decent prices, now makes wine.

Now if you're done laughing, we'll continue.

In the same way I love bad movies, I couldn't wait to try this wine. I bought it for $7.99 at the nearest President's Choice Liquor store, and brought it home... where it sat because I was both tantalized but terrified. My hopes were not terribly high.

The label is the generic yellow as everything else under the No Name sun. There is no description of which grapes went into this wine, not even a year of bottling (I don't count the copyright date as a bottling). There is nothing about the wine itself in the bottle except to say that it is red (and since the bottle is clear, thanks for the update, champ) and that it should be tried with pizza or lasagna. Erudite.

Upon opening, pouring, swirling and sniffing, I smelled vanilla.

The taste was initially peppery and very tannic. Now it sort of tastes like a red that sits heavy on your tongue, syrupy in how the flavour lingers.

This wine purportedly comes from Spain and I'd be more likely to believe it if it wrote the qualifier "Spain wine kit".

This is the type of wine you reserve for sangria or cooking. If you're having a terrible day, either have this wine to suit the mood, or don't have this wine because the taste won't make your day any better.